Free dating advice and tips

Dating Conversation - Knowing When To Talk And When To Shut Up

Part of any good relationship is knowing when to talk and when not to talk. This is relevant to a good conversation too. Navigating dating conversations can be a challenge, especially when it comes to knowing when to speak up and when to listen. It’s important to strike a balance between sharing information about yourself and showing interest in your date. In this article, we’ll explore some tips for mastering the art of dating conversation.

Be Present

The first step to engaging in a successful conversation is being present. This means putting your phone away, making eye contact, and actively listening. When you’re on a date, it’s important to show that you’re interested in what the other person has to say. This means not interrupting, asking follow-up questions, and being engaged in the conversation.

Read the Conversation

Make sure when trying to get a date, talk to someone that you are aware of the conversation and how the other person fits in.

Balanced Conversation

A good conversation should not be totally one sided. Don’t always talk about yourself as the other person may get bored.

Some people will be more willing speakers than others. Try recognize if you are a person that talks too much. Perhaps that is natural for you or you only do this when you are nervous. You can still be yourself, but also be considerate of your date.

If they are not openly trying to add things to the conversation, they may be a bit shy, or not know much about what you are talking about.

Ask Open Ended Questions

Perhaps you can ask them some questions to try and get them into the conversation. Good questions are open ended, ie, not a simple yes or no answer. If you ask a person an open ended question then they will have to think about it and give more than a one word answer. Be sure to listen to the answer and perhaps ask another related question.

Get Into the Conversation

If you are on the other hand and are not doing much of the talking, perhaps you need to stop nodding (either asleep or with your head) and start asking some questions or adding your own theories.

Is the Conversation Focussed?

Try to read the conversation. If your dates eyes are glazing over, you perhaps you are not in the right topic, or have been on it for too long.

Share Stories

Sharing stories is a great way to connect with your date. It can be easy to fall into the trap of just asking and answering questions, but stories are much more memorable. Share a funny or interesting anecdote about your day, a trip you took, or something that happened to you recently. This will give your date insight into who you are and provide a starting point for further conversation.

Show Interest

Just as it’s important to share information about yourself, it’s equally important to show interest in your date. Ask questions about their interests, hobbies, and passions. This will not only show that you’re interested in getting to know them, but it will also give you a better understanding of who they are as a person.

Know When to Stop Talking

It’s important to know when to stop talking and give your date a chance to speak. This means avoiding dominating the conversation or interrupting. If you notice that you’ve been talking for a while, take a break and ask your date a question. This will give them an opportunity to share their thoughts and feelings.

Be Mindful of Your Body Language

Your body language can say just as much as your words. Be mindful of your body language, making sure to maintain eye contact, keep an open posture, and show that you’re engaged in the conversation. Avoid crossing your arms or fidgeting, as this can give off the impression that you’re disinterested or uncomfortable.

Avoid Controversial Topics

When it comes to dating conversations, it’s best to avoid controversial topics such as politics or religion. While it’s important to be true to your beliefs, these topics can quickly turn a conversation sour. Stick to light and neutral topics, such as music, movies, and hobbies.


If you are not a natural at conversation you can prepare some questions you can fall back on to kick-start a conversation.

Conversation is an art that gets better with practice and some thought.

Dating conversation is all about finding a balance between sharing information about yourself and showing interest in your date. By being present, sharing stories, showing interest, knowing when to stop talking, being mindful of your body language, and avoiding controversial topics, you can master the art of dating conversation and create a lasting connection with your date.